I wasn’t sure what I was going to write about today. I guess I can thank UPS for providing a topic.
About two weeks ago I decided to pull the trigger and order an M3 MacBook Air from Apple. I popped for a terabyte of storage and Final Cut Pro because I want to use it to edit old home movies I’ve been digitizing, largely 8mm and Super8 film taken by Dad, Grandfather Fisher and Mom and Dad’s long-time next-door neighbor, Rich Richardson.
Rich was a professional movie cameraman for an aerospace firm. I suspect his footage of various water skiing and other vacation trips we went on together is top quality.
But I digress.
Shortly after ordering the MacBook I was notified it would be delivered on April 18th. Then I got another notification that it would be delivered on April 11th. On April 10th I checked the UPS tracking site and it said it would be delivered today, April 16th.
Last week Deb and Amanda were out of town, but since UPS said not to expect it until today I felt comfortable going out for a walk in the afternoon of April 11th because UPS said the delivery would be today.
Of course, it showed up while I was out on my walk. We have a Ring doorbell and here’s how much trouble the UPS driver went to:
If you time it, he was on the porch for less than 60 seconds, and didn’t ring the bell. Even if I had been home, if I was up in my office, as I often am, I wouldn’t have heard his knock. If he’d rung the bell I would have gotten a notification on my phone, even while out walking.
I didn’t even notice the failed delivery note until Friday. I made sure I was home all day Saturday in case they tried then, no joy. I also stayed close on Sunday. Again, no joy. I kept checking the UPS app and finally on Monday, April 15th it said I could expect the package by 7pm.
7pm came and went, no package.
This morning when I woke up I checked the UPS app and saw this:
WTF? I decided to call UPS to see if I could pick it up somewhere or get more information on the package. I.e. is it on a truck on it’s way? Is it sitting in a warehouse where I can go show ID and pick it up?
I called their Customer Hindrance number (that’s not what they call it, but that’s what it is), 800-742-5877. I got one of those “AI” voice bots. No matter what I tried it would not let me talk to an actual person. It always gave me the exact information the app as providing, which was useless.
So, I called UPS’ Corporate number, 404-828-6000. There were several menu options. I tried them all, none of them connected me to a human being, not even the HR or Stockholder Information options. Pressing 0 caused a hangup. Saying (then yelling as time went on) “Agent” also eventually resulted in a hangup. Pressing random numbers, hangup. A Substack post suggested cursing. Hangup again.
I called the local UPS store and talked to a delightful young woman named Lisa, who told me the only number they have is 800-742-5877, and they have same problem trying to track down packages. Even UPS’ franchisees can’t talk to a human being.
On one page of the UPS website I found an “email us” link. OK, let’s try that. I got a form asking for a bunch of irrelevant information, and requiring that I attach a file. I tried attaching the screenshot above, but it didn’t like the format of the image. So I figured out how to convert the screenshot from HEIC (or whatever the hell iPhones use) to a PDF and sent that. Got this error:
No way to get back to the form to resolve the error, so I gave up. They limit the text in the “email” to 500 characters. No way I can fit all my thoughts about this issue into 500 characters, so I plan to find the “email” link again and send them a link to this article.
I’ve also posted my complaint to X, Facebook, Threads, Mastodon, Bluesky & Instagram to try to get their attention. So far, nothing.
I just now checked the UPS tracking site from my PC and here’s what it shows.
I want to make it clear that my biggest issue here isn’t the messed-up delivery, it’s the “we-don’t-need-you,-you need us” attitude at UPS as evidenced that it’s impossible to get anyone on the phone. Unforgivable.
There are certain companies that have screwed me over time that I refuse to willingly do business with. If I don’t get my MacBook in the next 24 hours UPS will be on the list, along with Bank of America, AT&T and Wells Fargo. Actually I’ve never done business with Wells Fargo, but after their antics opening multiple accounts for customers without their knowledge or permission a few years ago they are dead to me.
I invite you to join me in my embargo of these companies.
Whew! I feel a little better, but I’ll feel a LOT better when I get my MacBook.
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